Welcome to Perspectives, a blog of thoughts, commentary and observations ranging from autistic adolescents to intimate portraits of urban communities.

 

Sins of the Fathers

Yesterday Pope Francis stunned the world’s 1.2 billion Catholics by announcing the Church’s support for gay marriage. In his first encyclical, De Coniugium Hominum, the Argentine-born pontiff called gay marriage the eighth (or “lost”) sacrament, which the Church has been looking for since the second century. “I’m just relieved we found it before Dan Brown did,” he told a press conference. “He’d have had a field day.”

Although the pronouncement came on the heels of revelations in La Repubblica and The New York Times about the existence of a powerful “gay lobby” at the Vatican, Francis emphatically denied that the group had pressured him into his new position. “They contributed excellent research,” he said, “but they always presented it in a scholarly manner. Think more ‘library’ (biblioteca) than ‘lobby’ (Via K).”

Asked if the apparent liberalizing of Church doctrine might lead to the ordination of women, Francis replied, “I see no connection. We’ve had gay clergy for centuries, and we have never yet had a woman priest. That should tell you something.”

Speaking on condition of anonymity (which in the Vatican is pronounced “Omertà”), one insider said, “You can take it to our bank – and for a small fee we will launder the money for you – you’ll see a queen sitting on Saint Peter’s throne before you hear a woman preaching from the pulpit.”

Francis affirmed that homosexuality remains a moral disorder and a sin in the Church’s eyes. “Do as we say,” said the pope, “not as we do.”

A Different Path

American Terror